Rehearsal Dinner

I'm sure many can relate to (and I'm glad we aren't the only ones who have this issue) trying to get your kids to eat--especially at dinner time. So I thought I'd lay out the script we have for the evening meal.

S: Time for dinner!
A: I don't like dinner, I like lunch.
S: Ok, fine, it's lunch.
A: But it's not a sandwich.
M: Do you want to put your rice on bread?
A: (whimpering)
M: Bekah, take your fork out of your milk.
S: Alex, eat.
A: But I need help.
M: How old are you?
A: 3
M: Then you don't need help.
A: But I don't want to be 3.
M: Bekah, use your fork.
S: Alex, you need to eat.
A: I want Bekah to eat it.
B: I don't want it.
S: Better eat before it gets cold.
B: (holding her bowl out) Dad, can I put you in the microwave?
M: You want to put ME in the microwave?
A: (giggles)
B: I don't want onion.
M: You are an onion.
B: No, your a bummie onion.
S: Bekah, use your fork!