Comebacks and One liners

Toddlers are the best at leaving you stumped as to what to say next. All of these examples are from my kids when they were around 3 years old.

Keturah:

I tell her to eat her food. She says "No. You eat it."
I warn, "Keturah, don't argue with me."
She calmly replies, "I'm not. I'm arguing without you."

 To convince her that she should let me put on her tights, I tell her they look cute on her.
She insists, "Cute is not good for me. Cute is for Bekah."

I was driving somewhere in a hurry. When your 2 1/2 yr old asks, "Mom, are we done racing?", when you get to a red light, you might be getting a little reckless.

Again with the food. Trying to "sell" the orange to her, I said, "This is a good orange."
She wonders, "Oh. There is good on it?"

In response to Dad's tickling, "Don't tickle my butter."
(okay, so she was really saying "brother", but it is funnier when you assume she said "butter")

Alex:

To explain why we had to wash his hands in another sink, I told him the soap had run out.
He was astounded, "The soap ran out of the room?"


Explaining why he shouldn't take his toys to his nursery class at church, I said that the other kids might accidentally break them and then he'd be sad.
I then took his hand and starting walking toward the room. He was concerned and said, "Mom, they might break you, too."

Matt was driving and I read an upcoming street sign out loud, "No left turn. No U turn."
Alex exclaims, "No! MY turn."

Bekah:

I think my favorite one (and I wrote about this before) was when she excused herself for kicking her brother: "I'm exercising."

Okay, these next ones are cheating a little bit. Bekah has said all of these in the last month or so. She gets in these moods where she says the most random stuff. Alex recognizes these moments and always eggs her on because it makes him laugh like crazy.

Matt called her a monkey.
She called him a "Beef-Head Chicken"

An observation/revelation: "Shocking someone is like spicy cheese."

Changing up a classic song, "Bob the Biscuit, Can we eat it? Bob the Biscuit, yes we can!"

Narrating an animated picture of a man standing at his front door and a woman on the front step:
Man: I have an eyeball, welcome.
Woman: I want to marry you for breakfast.